The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
love makes seman taste better
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Randomize