do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
