He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
