he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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