and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Randomize
