So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
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