What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Randomize
