Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
He fingered me to the beat of the Fresh Prince theme song... it was pretty fantastic.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
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