Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Drunk. Come get me. Out front blue shirt.
Where are you? And you borrowed my shirt. I know what you're wearing. How wasted are you?
Hotel
WHICH HOTEL??
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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