I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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