He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
No, this year you're all getting coupons for things like "no yelling because you had sex in my apartment" or "the last beer."
Randomize
