You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
My Sexting was not on an AP level
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
Randomize