...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
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