so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Drunk level: ugly crying in the bar upon discovery of sweet tarts and not smarties.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize