I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
turns out my ex girlfriend has become my most successful wingman. life is fuckin weird sometimes
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
