I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Febreezed myself at a stop light on the way to the IRS office. Judgmental glare from some old lady in the car next to me, thumbs up from her husband.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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