Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i've created a new STD.
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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