what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
