I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Randomize
