If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Randomize
