well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
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you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
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she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
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