Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
We haven't been trashed enough to shut down a bar together in four days. I'm starting to worry that we're growing apart.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
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