Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize