So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
If I come in tomorrow with a cane and a seeing eye dog it's because I just mixed up my salicylic acid acne stuff with my eye makeup remover
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
I smell like Dick and happiness
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
