He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Not my fault people bought me shots. waving a shot in my face is like waving a cock in yours
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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