do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
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Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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