loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
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