I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You fed me pizza off a sword last night.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
