I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Listen I took a family sized bottle of merlot to the face last night and there's an svu marathon on. Give me some time please.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Randomize
