did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
Randomize
