You really coming over, don't trick.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Randomize
