I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
My mom woke me up in a bubble bath this morning.
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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