he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Randomize
