Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
My girlfriend went down on me and as she did she hummed the theme from star wars and pretended my dick was a lightsaber...I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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