ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Success! We fucked roommates!
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
