SEEEEXXX PLEASE
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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