so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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