We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Randomize
