can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It only takes once for you to drunkly piss on a chick for her to lose interest in you.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
Randomize