screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Randomize
