Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
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