Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
