I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
Randomize