My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just had to wipe vomit off my fone to text you. yeah that hungover.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
Randomize