Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Need sex. Gaining weight.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
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so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
What a dumb baby whore.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
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Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
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