This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
