we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
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i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
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I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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