My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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