HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
