Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
